Alright. So I've gotten around to cleaning up the board and tested the resistance:
1V is 212, 1.14V is 45, 3.3V is 6.3k, and 5V is 4.8M ohms.
5V seems a bit weird but I probably won't even be attaching that to the board so I'm not too worried. Before I start reattaching the USB port, do these...